Understanding Your Middos - 91 Fire – Grievances

Hakpadah (Grievances) – A Product of the Soul’s Element of Fire

We are in the midst of discussing the element of fire. We have so far explained, in the previous lessons, the traits of conceit and anger which are fire-based traits. Rav Chaim Vital adds on that there are three additional traits which are produced from the element of fire: hakpadah (grievance), kavod (honor), serarah (control) and sinah (hatred).

In this lesson, we will learn about the trait of hakpadah, grievance.

Hakpadah/Grievance – A Product of Conceit and Anger

We do not find the term “hakpadah” in the Torah, but we do find this term in the words of our Sages. The Sages taught, “One should always be humble like Hilel, and not be a “kapdan” (intolerant) like Shammai.”[1]

(The root letters in the word kapdan are the letters of the word kapad, can be rearranged either into the word “pakad”, which means to “remember”, and “dafak”, which means to “knock”. Soon the implication of this will be explained.)

Rav Chaim Vital says that the trait of hakpadah (having a grievance) comes from the traits of gaavah (conceit) and anger together. Hakpadah is more apparently a revelation of anger. Without anger, a person wouldn’t have a grievance. Hakpadah is essentially a very minimal level of anger.

That is a general description of hakpadah. To get more specific, the Gemara says that anger is in the liver[2], and when one is angry, his soul’s element of fire rises [through the bloodstream] to his head, as in the verse, “His blood is in his head”.[3] The trait of hakpadah (grievance) doesn’t come from the process of the element of fire rising from the liver to the head, but from the process of the element of fire that rises from the liver to the heart. Anger starts from the liver, and it becomes revealed and expressed in the head (on the face, when a person’s face turns red from anger), but the trait of hakpadah is revealed in the heart.

Chazal state “Although Hashem forgave His anger to the Jewish people, He held onto a kepaidah, a grievance towards them, in His heart.” Hashem remained with some small level of anger towards the Jewish people, so to speak, even after His anger subsided. From this we see that hakpadah is a degree of anger that remains in the heart. When anger becomes total, it rises from the heart and it is verbalized by the mouth. But when anger remains in the heart, it is hakpadah.

Hakpadah (Grievances) Creates Separation and Divisiveness

The root of the word hakpadah is the word kapad, which can also mean karat, to “cut off”. As an example, in the laws of going to the mikveh, if a person is makpid (bothered) by anything that’s on his or her body when immersing, it is called a chatzitzah, a separation, and it disqualifies the immersion.[4] Hence, being makpid (hakpadah) creates separation. This is the connection between hakpadah and the term “karat”, “cutting off”.

Additionally, the Gemara says that the lives of three people are not considered to be lives, and one of them is the kapdanim, people who are always intolerant of others.[5] This is also related to the trait of machlokes, dissension. The machlokes of Korach caused divisiveness, and it came from hakpadah. This is because the very power to cause division is hakpadah, for hakpadah creates a chatzitzah (a separation). When one feels intolerant towards something, this creates a separation and divisiveness, and the result of this is machlokes (dissension), which can later lead to the trait of hatred.

It was mentioned at the beginning of this lesson that the root of the word hakpadah is kapad, which can be rearranged into the word “pakad”, which means to “remember.” The first time in the Torah where we find the term “pakad” is, “And G-d remembered Sarah”. When Sarah gave Hagar to Avraham to bear children, Hashem was not yet “pakad es Avraham”, and later Sarah told Avraham to send out Hagar. Avraham didn’t want to send her out, and Sarah said to him, “Let G-d judge between me and you.”[6]

Sarah was angry that Avraham wasn’t sending away Hagar, and this was the kind of anger of hakpadah. She had a hakpadah (grievance) on Avraham. We find that in halachah, there are certain instances where a person is allowed have taarumos, “grievances”, against another person. Sarah had taarumos/grievances on Avraham, so she had hakpadah towards Avraham. Sarah also said, “My anger will be upon you”, and the Torah here says the word “chamasi”, “my anger”, from the word chaimah, anger.

Later, the Torah says that Hashem was “pakad es Sarah”, Hashem “remembered” Sarah by granting her a child. The depth behind this is that Sarah’s original hakpadah on Avraham was now turned from hakpadah into pakad. Sarah’s original anger could now become a catalyst that had led her to being remembered by Hashem, pakad.

Each of our Avos (forefathers) corresponds to one of the three active elements. Avraham corresponds to the element of water (loving kindness), Yitzchok corresponds to fire (strength and judgment), and Yaakov corresponds to wind (compassion, the synthesis between kindness and judgment). The birth of Yitzchok therefore revealed the holy manifestation of the element of fire. Sarah originally had hakpadah (grievance) against Avraham, which was the trait of fire, and this led to the root of Yitzchok’s birth. Hence, the connection between Yitzchok and the element of fire began with Sarah’s hakpadah which preceded the birth of Yitzchok.

The exodus from Egypt was calculated from the birth of Yitzchok, which began the count of the 420 years of exile which Avraham’s descendants would undergo. When Hashem told Avraham of the exile, He promised Avraham that when the time for redemption would come, “I will surely remember them”, “pakod yifkod eschem”.[7] Why does the Torah use the word pakad twice here? It is because pakad is rooted in the term hakpadah, and hakpadah creates division and separation, which is two, and hence the double terminology of the word pakad.

Division (Fire) Mainly Affects The Element of Water

The first time in Creation where there was a “kepaidah”, a “division”, was on the second day of Creation, when Hashem split the waters. Chazal state that all machlokes (division) was created on the second day of Creation, with the splitting of the waters, and on that day as well, the fire of Gehinnom was created as well.[8] Hence, there is a connection between the element of water and the element of fire, with regards to division.

Kepaidah causes division, but what exactly does it divide? Kepaidah divides the element of water. The Hebrew word for “heavens” is rekia, is from the word kara, which means “to tear”. The waters of the world were split into the upper heavens [above in Heaven] and the skies and waters [of our world]. Hashem used the element of fire, the power of division, to split the waters of the world. Thus, all division (kepaidah) is rooted in the element of fire, and the division affects the element of water.

The Gemara[9] says that there is a certain spiritual harm caused by zugos, using “pairs” [i.e. eating two eggs in a meal], but this can only harm a person is he is kapid, if he is concerned about this, but if one isn’t kapid, if he isn’t concerned about this problem, then he is not affected by zugos. What is the depth of this? It is because if he is makpid, it means that he is connected to the very idea of division, and when that is the case, he will be harmed by division. Zugos can only harm the person who is “makpid”, meaning that he is connected to the state of division. If he is not connected to the concept of division, then the harm caused by zugos (pairs and divisions) cannot affect him or harm him.

How The Element of Wind Unifies The Division Between Fire and Water

The three active elements (fire, wind and water) correspond to the three main sections of the body. The element of fire corresponds to the highest part of the body, the head. The element of wind corresponds to the middle section of the body, which includes the chest, heart and torso. The element of water corresponds to the lower section of the body, the stomach [and below].

Ever since Hashem split the waters, by using the element of fire to create a division in the waters, the elements of water and fire are not able to co-exist together on This World. When the waters were split, there was now a division created of Upper Waters, in Heaven, and Lower Waters, on This World. In the Upper Waters, in Heaven, the elements of fire and water are able to exist together. A hint to this is that the word shomayim (heaven) is from the words aish (fire) and mayim (water), implying that fire and water can harmonize together in Heaven. But the waters of This World, which are the Lower Waters, are not able to unify with fire, ever since the split.

In Heaven, water can co-exist with fire, but on This World, water can exist only without fire. On This World, in order for water to exist, it must remain by itself without fire. Water was originally one unit, at the beginning of Creation. Fire split the waters into two different sections. Because fire’s place is [mainly] in Heaven, the Lower Waters are not able to unify with the Upper Waters in Heaven, which are connected with the element of fire.

Normally, water cannot combine with fire. But through the element of wind, the water is able to be connected with fire without being harmed, and vice versa. Since the element of wind is placed in between the elements of fire and water – as we can see from the fact that the middle section of the body connects the head with the lower section of the body – the element of wind is able to harmonize somewhat the elements of fire and water, to allow them to co-exist at once together in a way that they won’t harm each other.

As mentioned before, kepaidah (grievance) is in the heart. The heart is in the middle area of the body, which corresponds to the element of wind. Therefore, when “fire” is in the heart, this is not the element of “fire” itself, but the “fire” within the element of wind. Therefore, hakpadah comes from fire-of-wind. As explained earlier, the “fire” of anger rises from the liver to the head. The “fire” of kepaidah (grievance) is formed when the fire remains in the heart, without rising to the head. As we are explaining here, this fire is actually fire-of-wind. When a person has kepaidah in his heart towards someone, this issue is coming from an impaired “fire-of-wind” that has settled on his heart.

As mentioned earlier, the root letters of the word hakpadah are kapad, which can be rearranged as the word dafak. The word dafak means to “knock”. It is referring the power of sound. We find this term in the verse, “Kol Dodi Dofek”, “The voice of My Beloved knocks”, and Chazal explain this to mean that “the voice of my Beloved knocks on the heart”[10] [the voice of inspiration to improve is felt in the heart, in the emotions]. Thus, defikah (knocking) takes place in the heart. This “knocking” is a use of the element of wind[11], because it is a kind of movement, and all movement comes from the element of wind.

From this we can learn that the way to repair hakpadah (grievances) in the heart is by using the element of wind. Hakpadah (grievance) can become transformed into defikah.

Repairing Hakpadah (Grievances) Through Earth/Humility

We can now ask: What is the remedy for the trait of kepaidah?

One way is the simple way. The opposite of the trait of kepaidah is when one is humble he can endure inconsideration and insults from others. As the Sages teach, “Be humble like Hilel, and not a kapdan (intolerant) like Shamai.” Hence, being humble is the simple antidote for hakpadah (being intolerant). This is a use of the element of earth. 

How does the element of earth repair an impaired element of fire? The dryness of earth can connect to the dryness of the element of fire, and then the coldness of the earth can repair the heat of fire.

But there is also another remedy for the trait of kepaidah, and it is found in the element of wind. It was explained here that kepaidah is in the heart, which is “fire-of-wind”. Therefore, since kepaidah is a kind of “fire” that is within the category of “wind”, we can use wind, the more powerful element here, to pervade over the “fire” that is kepaidah.

Hakpadah Is Repaired Through “Defikah” - Wordless Sound

It has been explained here how the trait of kepaidah is all about causing divisiveness, because the term kepaidah is related to the term “karat”, “splitting”. We so far mentioned that the opposite arrangement of the letters of the word “kapad” is “dafak”, which implies that dafak (or defikah/knocking) can repair kepaidah.

Let us see the implication of “dafak”, or defikah, and how this can repair the trait of kepaidah.

The term dafak is in the verse, “Kol Dodi Dofek”, “The voice of my Beloved knocks”. While the simple way to repair the trait of hakpadah is by being humble, to be a shefal ruach (humble spirit) as the Sage Hilel was, the deeper and more inner way to repair kepaidah lies in using the element of wind.

In Egypt, the people had kotzer ruach, they were short of breath, from all of the labor. The “shortness of breath” implies a kind of wordless sound, where a person is not verbalizing any letters or words, because he is in pain. Chazal teach that “The world stands on the merit of those who are silent during strife”[12], meaning that the person doesn’t utter any letters or words when he’s angry. When letters combine, they form words. But when one doesn’t verbalize any letters, he doesn’t speak. When a person doesn’t verbalize any letters or words, what is he able to do? The only thing he can do is produce a wordless sound, using his voice.

Therefore, the depth behind not speaking when one is upset or in pain is because instead of speaking, a person can use his voice for a wordless sound.

This is otherwise known as the power of niggun, song.

Erasing Hakpadah/Grievances By Using The Power of Niggun/Song

In a niggun (song or hum), there are no words or letters coming from the person’s voice, only a wordless sound. This is the implication of “Kol Dodi dofek”, the “knocking of the heart”, a sound where there are no letters or words being verbalized. When the mouth isn’t producing any letters or words, there are no words here which can be divided into other words. When dividing isn’t possible, there cannot be hakpadah, because hakpadah thrives on division.

Thus, there are two ways to repair the trait of kepaidah. One way is, as the Sages teach, is that one should be like Hilel, who was humble. Another, deeper way to fix kepaidah is by using the element of wind, by producing a wordless sound, a niggun (humming a tune or song). There are no letters or words being verbalized in this sound. When there are no letters or words being verbalized, the words cannot be divided, and when division isn’t possible, the trait of hakpadah doesn’t get a chance to take root.

This is an inner method of how to fix any kepaidah (grievances) that one has in his heart towards others. Therefore, practically speaking, whenever a person feels a kepaidah in his heart at someone or something, he should sing a niggun. This will transform his kepaidah - the anger which causes divisiveness and separation - into defikah, a wordless sound, which is from the verse “kol Dodi dofek”.

As we have elaborated here, all kepaidah is rooted in a division of letters into words. When the number one becomes divided into two, and then two becomes three and three becomes four, there is further and further distance and division from the original oneness. Therefore, the inner way to repair kepaidah (grievances of the heart) is through wordless sound, when a person doesn’t verbalize any letters or words. This avoids the kepaidah (grievance) and machlokes (divisiveness) from taking root in the first place. When there is wordless sound – the power of shirah (song) and niggun (tune) - there can be no place for kepaidah.

The Song of the Leviim Atoned For The Trait of Kepaidah/Grievances

Based upon this, we can now add on the following insight. In the Beis HaMikdash, there was the avodah of the Kohanim and the avodah of the Leviim. The avodah of the Kohanim represents the side of chessed/kindness, whereas the song of the Leviim represents the side of din/judgment.  Since din/judgment corresponds to the element of fire, the song of the Leviim atoned for any impaired uses of the element of fire.

The avodah of the Kohanim atoned for the trait of anger, while the song of the Leviim atoned for any kepaidah (grievances) that are left over from anger. When a person sins, he angers Hashem. Even after one’s sin is atoned and Hashem’s anger towards the sinner has been erased, there still remains a kepaidah, a ‘grievance’ of Hashem upon the person, so to speak, which remains left over from the anger. Thus, the song of the Leviim atones for the remaining kepaidah of Hashem on the person, after Hashem’s anger towards the person has subsided due to the avodah of the Kohanim. The song of the Leviim revealed the power of kol Dodi dofek, “the voice of My beloved knocks”, which is the power of song that erases kepaidah/grievances.

The role of the avodah of the Kohanim was to deal with the root, which is the anger of Hashem at the person who sins. The role of the Leviim, through their shirah, was to deal with the “branch” left over from the root, any traces of kepaidah (grievances) that are left over from anger. If there would be any remaining kepaidah of Hashem on the person, the “fire” of the korbonos would not be able to ascend on High, just as a human being’s trait of kepaidah is a “fire” that does not rise to his head, remaining in his heart as a feeling of grievance that is not released. But through the song of the Leviim, which erased any remaining kepaidah of Hashem on the sinner, the fire of the korbonos was allowed to ascend on High.

When anger rises from the heart to the head and it is expressed outwardly through a person’s face and mouth, the anger is an impaired fire. But even when the fire of anger is removed, it can still remain in a person’s heart, where it is felt as a kepaidah, a grievance. Through the power of song (at the most complete level, the song of the Leviim), the anger can rise properly from the heart to the head [and outward through the mouth, by way of song].

In Summary and Conclusion

Thus, there are two ways to repair the trait of kepaidah (having grievances against someone): One way is through being humble, “to be like Hilel, who was humble”, and another way is through the power of shirah, song.