Fixing Your Earth - 009 Solutions for Sadness Caused By Wind-of-Earth

Sadness Due To Wind-of-Earth: Unfulfilled Aspirations

Now we will discuss the sadness caused by wind-of-earth, which will branch into earth-of-wind-of-earth, water-of-wind-of-earth, wind-of-wind-of-earth, and fire-of-wind-of-earth. We mentioned earlier that this is a kind of sadness which stems from unfulfilled aspirations.

When I Wish I Could Want The Right Thing (Earth-of-Wind-of-Earth)

First we will discuss sadness coming from earth within wind-of-earth. This happens when the ratzon (will) of a person is not met. When a person has a ratzon (will) for something, when he “wanted” to “want” - but he doesn’t end up keeping to his motivation – this can make him sad inside.

This is not to be confused with a person has a ratzon (will) for something and he doesn’t get what he wants. That is a different kind of sadness, and it is a more general kind of sadness, which is a simple feeling of frustration of not getting what we want. We aren’t discussing this here. Here we are discussing a kind of sadness in which a person loses his drive in having a ratzon for something worthy. In other words, he wishes that he could still be motivated to pursue something worthy, but he finds that he has lost his motivation, and he’s sad from this.

The Solution: Consolation

To solve this kind of sadness, a person can console himself with the fact that he at least has a ratzon to want something worthy. So he hasn’t really lost his motivation, even though he thinks he did. He needs to realize that the fact that he is bothered shows that he still has his ratzon intact. He still “wants” that worthy goal he wishes he could be motivated more to do.

Although this doesn’t totally solve the sadness he is feeling, it is somewhat soothing to know that at least he hasn’t totally lost his motivation. It is an accomplishment in and of itself to at least have a ratzon for spiritual growth, even when a person knows that he isn’t yet at the “actualization” stage. This can comfort a person when he thinks about it.

A person can try to use the power of emunah in order to help himself realize this concept. He can tell himself that although he wanted a certain goal, that doesn’t necessarily mean that it was good for him. Or, he can realize that what he wanted was simply above his current level to actualize, so it wasn’t realistic.

This is the solution for a sadness that comes in general when a person doesn’t fulfill what he wanted.

Sadness Coming From Imaginary Frustration

What is the solution, though, for someone who is sad that he no longer even has a ratzon for a ratzon – someone who has lost his motivation entirely? Such a person isn’t able to console himself with the fact that at least he wants a worthy goal, because he has lost his ratzon altogether. If so, what can he do about his sadness?

It is a sign that he is sad due to his imagination. A person imagines that he doesn’t even want any more spiritual growth anymore, and that is the root of the problem. If a person ever says that he’s totally not interested in growth or in improving, it’s a sign that his imagination is dominating him. By nature, our soul wants to grow and improve; if a person claims otherwise, it’s his imagination talking. 

The Solution: Making A List Of What I Should Want Out Of Life

The solution for this, then, is for a person to sit and think about what he is supposed to want from himself in life. He has already identified in himself a thought that he doesn’t want to grow, and he clearly feels that he is not motivated, so what can he do about this? He can at least think to himself, “Although I don’t want to grow higher in life, I know that I am supposed to. What am I supposed to want? What should I want in life, and what shouldn’t I want in life?” This will get him started to think.

Chazal say that a person should say, “When will my actions reach that of my forefathers?” There is a holy desire in every soul to connect to spiritual growth. If a person doesn’t have this yearning in himself, and it bothers him that he doesn’t have this aspiration, he can at least reveal in himself a desire that he want such a goal; to get himself to have “a ratzon to have a ratzon”.^[1]

To work on this practically, a person should become aware of everything that he wants in his life, and make a list. Then, he should think about what he is supposed to want in life [which is to grow in spiritualty and holiness].

When I Can’t Hold Onto My Inspiration (Water-of-Wind-of-Earth)

There is also sadness caused by ‘water’ within wind-of-earth. This is when a person is sad because he sees that sometimes he does want to grow spiritually, and sometimes he doesn’t. The nature of water is to flow, which symbolizes continuation. So when a person sees that there is no continuation of his ratzon (will), this itself can make him sad.

The Solution: Awakening The Inspiration A Little More

What is the solution to such sadness?

Chazal say that Hashem desires to stay with the Jewish people even after Yom Tov ends. “Stay with me one more day.” For this reason, we have Isru Chag, the day after Yom Tov – a day in which we can continue our ratzon for holiness, even though the level of Yom Tov has gone.

From this we can learn the solution to the above mentioned sadness. When a person sees that his ratzon for growth is leaving him, he can awaken his ratzon again so that it doesn’t weaken. A person can keep his ratzon to continue for just a little more, each time that he feels that he is losing his ratzon. This gives a person a power of continuation, and ability to keep continuing even as he feels his motivation weakening.

It doesn’t totally remove a person’s sadness, because there will still be sadness that most of the ratzon has gone away. But it can still remove some of the sadness by giving a person hope for the future – that in the future, his ratzon will return.

Torn Between Contradicting Desires In Life (Wind-of-Wind-of-Earth)

Another kind of sadness comes from the ‘wind’ within the wind-of-earth. This is when a person runs into inner contradictions; when he sees that he has two contradictory desires. When a person has two different desires that contradict each other, this makes him sad.

Compare this to a person who is married to two wives who hate each other (in the times of the Gemara, when they were allowed to marry more than one wife), and he’s stuck in middle of all the clashing.

Most people have two different desires that totally contradict each other. This creates an inner struggle inside a person. A person can go a long time with this war inside himself, and what happens when there is a war? Each side strengthens itself. When a person goes for a long time in his life with two contradictory desires, the war gets stronger and stronger as his life goes on, because each of the desires get strengthened to oppose each other. The internal war inside a person, as it goes on, causes sadness with it.

Many times a person knows he is sad inside, but he can’t identify what is making him sad. This can be because his soul senses it, even though he doesn’t see it; just like the Gemara says that a person can become afraid of something very suddenly even when he doesn’t see something scary, because even though he doesn’t see something scary, his mazal (astrological sign) sees it. That is one option. Another reason it can be, though, is from his imagination - he is imagining that he is sad.

How can a person figure out what he wants and then solve the sadness that this contradictory desires cause him?

The Solution: Becoming Aware of Your Subconscious Thoughts

A person’s ratzon is rooted in his subconscious. People usually don’t know what they really want, but their true desires are hidden deep in their subconscious. Most people are not aware of what’s going on in their subconscious, so they don’t know what they want. But their ratzon is there, and it just hidden away somewhere in the deep recesses of their mind.

If so, the way to get into the ratzon is to access the mind’s thoughts. A person can become aware of his various inner desires by becoming more aware of his thoughts. He can then discover more about what he really wants. After that, a person can uncover different desires in himself that contradict each other.

This is a very subtle kind of ability that a person has. The more a person becomes aware of his thoughts, the more he becomes aware of subtle thoughts that pass by very quickly, and he can catch them. He will then discover his hidden desires - and he will see his inner contradictions too.

A person should therefore take one root desire he has (which he can discover, through becoming aware of his thoughts) and then focus on that one desire, which will weaken all his other various desires. This is a way to “kill off” all of the various desires in a person: by becoming aware of his root desire, he realizes that all his other desires are like nothing when compared to his main Ratzon in life.

So when a person feels sad, he can get used to nullifying his various desires in life, by discovering within himself one very powerful ratzon that makes all his other desire like nothing. This is also called “bittul” (nullification) of the ratzon. The more a person nullifies his ratzon, the more he can take away the sadness that his desires cause him.

When I Don’t Feel Excited About What I Do (Fire-of-Wind-of-Earth)

Another kind of sadness is caused by fire within wind-of-earth. This is when person feels a ratzon (will) for something, but even though he is motivated, he doesn’t feel enthusiastic about it.

The fact that he doesn’t feel excited about what he wants can also be its own cause for sadness. It comes from the ‘fire’ aspect, because the nature of enthusiasm comes from inner fire. Hence, when one is sad when he doesn’t feel enthused about what he wants, the sadness is coming from fire-of-wind-of-earth.

Some desires in a person are calmer and quieter in their nature. Calm desires are rooted in water, and they are referred to as “mayim shekaitim”, “calm waters.” Other desires in a person, though, are of a ‘louder’ nature, and they are rooted in wind (of water), which is noisy. You can see this from two different kinds of people who pursue desires. Some people, while being very persistent in pursuing their desires, are pursuing desires that are quiet and calm. Other people have desires that are very noticeable to others, which are “noisy” kinds of desire. These desires can make a person sad, and we explained this before.

But there is another kind of sadness, and that is when a person has a ratzon for motivation and for growth, and he even is able to keep his ratzon to continue and hold onto his inspiration, but he doesn’t feel enthusiastic about what he wants. If a person is motivated but he is sad because he notices a the lack of enthusiasm in himself, and he’s wondering why he doesn’t feel so excited, this stems from fire-of-wind-of-earth.

When people don’t feel enthused about what they do, the natural result is that they look for new things. This is very damaging to a person, and it causes many a downfall, especially to young people who are in the midst of their development of what they want in life. When a person doesn’t feel enthused and he wants something to feel enthusiastic about it, he will look for “chiddushim” – something new, in order to stir up his enthusiasm.

What indeed can a person do to become more enthusiastic towards what he does and in what he wants?

The Solution: The Powers of “Hisbonenus” (Reflection) and “Shinun” (Repetition)

One solution that can work is to use the power of “hisbonenus” (mental reflection). A person can reflect into a certain concept many times, until he becomes enthusiastic just when he thinks about it, and in this way, he won’t need new things to get him excited. However, hisbonenus is hard for most people to implement, because it requires a lot of mental strength and perseverance.

There is another solution that is simpler to utilize. This is called the power of “shinun” – to repeat the same words, again and again, each time attempting to say it more enthusiastically. This helps a person get used to becoming excited even the same old thing, and that he doesn’t have to come onto new things to get him excited.

For example, when a person reads a few lines of Gemara or mussar, he should repeat it again and again, each time with a little more excitement than before. He can use a niggun (melody) that he enjoys which can spur on his excitement.

However, a person should choose one niggun and stay with it; if a person tries to use a different niggun each time, he’s still searching for something new each time, and he’s back to the old problem. It will make him become very scattered inside.

Enthusiasm is different each time, and there is no “set” way to become enthusiastic. It is something that changes each time. In this way, it refreshes a person who doesn’t have what to feel enthusiastic about.

In Conclusion

Any of these solutions are only partial solutions. For example, if a person is sad because he’s not enthusiastic about what he wants, then he can help himself become more enthusiastic, but he will still remain with the other kinds of sadness we spoke about before. Yet, when a person uses any of these solutions (after discovering what the cause of his sadness is), he can remove some of his sadness and be helped to a certain degree.

Even after we work on removing ourselves from sadness, there will always be some sadness left in us. This is a result of the sin of Adam, who was cursed with, “And with crushing labor you shall eat.” There was a general curse of sadness given to mankind after the sin, and there is nothing we can do about this. So there is always some sadness inside us which we can never totally remove, and we can only help ourselves remove our sadness partially – through the solutions we have given.

When a person works on removing his sadness – whether it is rooted in earth, water, wind or fire – he will be left with the inevitable deep sadness that all human beings have to deal with: the general curse of sadness that was given to mankind, which is that we have to work hard in life.

What should we do about this discovery? We must “accept suffering with love”, as Chazal say. There is always some sadness left in us, and this is the curse given to mankind; we have to accept it, but lovingly.