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 next in series:Bilvavi Part 3 - Section 3 Prayer
 previous in series: Bilvavi Part 3 - Section 1 Ladder of Growth
    • בלבבי ג - פ' ב תורה
      Section 2 Torah

Bilvavi Part 3 - Section 2 Torah

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Bilvavi 3, Section 2: Torah (6 chapters)

 

Section Two: Torah: Chapter One: Torah and D’veykus with Hashem

 

A person must first reflect on the purpose of his life

 

The first thing a person needs to do is to contemplate what he wants to do with his life.

 

A storeowner knows clearly that the reason why he has his store is to make money. A businessman is involved in business because he knows that he can’t just lay idle all day. So must a person contemplate and think well into the purpose of his life, and what he wants to get out of life.

 

Of course, there are many people who live their lives to get honor or become rich. But we are not dealing with those kinds of ambitions; any sensible person knows that those people are far from the truth.

 

Many people think that the purpose of life is

“To finish the Talmud in-depth and be stringent in the mitzvos”

 

We will probe this matter deeper. Many people will claim that they have a great drive to study Torah, know all of the Talmud in-depth, and perform all of the mitzvos properly, and with all the stringencies involved.

 

But the Ramchal tells us that there is more than that to a person’s life.

 

The Ramchal, in the beginning of his sefer, Mesillas Yesharim, writes: “The pillar of piety, and the root of wholesome service, is that he should truly clarify his purpose on this world, and to what he should place his outlook on, in all his life’s toil. Behold, our Sages have told us that a person was not created except to have pleasure in Hashem.”

 

He also writes, “It is therefore proper that one should devote all his doings to the Creator, and he should not have any other motivation in any of his actions, whether small or big, except to come to close to Hashem; until he pulls himself after the Creator like iron clings to a rock…”

 

 

The purpose of man is to attach himself to the Creator

 

Let us reflect on this. The Ramchal is telling us that the purpose of everything is to come close to Hashem and to have “pleasure in Him.” This does not mean to say that one shouldn’t know the Talmud; we know that the world can only stand on Torah learning. It must be, then, that the purpose of knowing the Torah is to cleave to Hashem (d’veykus).

 

The mistaken form of attachment to the Creator

 

There is an old argument by many. We know that “Hashem, Torah, and the Jewish people are one”. (This is brought by the Zohar). So if a person learns Torah, it should follow that he is automatically attached to Hashem; after all, they are both intertwined. If so, it seems that a person doesn’t have to strive for personal attachment to Hashem, because it is enough that he’s attached to the Torah…

 

This is a grave error that people make.

 

According to this reasoning, a person could attach himself to the nation of Israel – which can surely be himself, because his soul is part of the Jewish people – and then he won’t have to learn Torah, basing it on the fact that “Hashem and the Jewish people are also one.” This is an absurd argument.

 

It is therefore clear to anyone who seeks the truth that these words of the Zohar cannot be read simply. We need a vast amount of knowledge to figure out the meaning of those words, but this cannot be the meaning.

 

In the mind or in the heart?

 

Another reason why people make the mistake of believing that attachment to the Torah alone is called d’veykus is because people lack the understanding of what it means to have d’veykus in Hashem. A person thinks that attachment to Hashem is in his thoughts, and he therefore thinks that if his thoughts are attached to the Torah, he is automatically attached to Hashem as well, since “Hashem and the Torah are one”… but the truth is that being attached to Hashem means something else entirely.

 

True closeness to Hashem and attachment to Him are not in the mind; it is in the heart. Only someone who learns Torah “of the heart” – as it says, “My heart saw great wisdom” – can bring a person to become attached to Hashem.

True attachment to HASHEM is actual closeness to Him

 

To be attached to Hashem (d’veykus) is to actually feel close to Him.

 

We will give a parable to explain this. Reuven is standing next to Shimon, and he is focusing entirely on the Shimon. Yet, he can still be far away from Shimon - as far away as the distance between the sky and the land! This is because his heart is not with him - only his mind. There can only be friendship between two people if their hearts are attached to each other and they love each other. It is not the place that distances or draws one closer to the Creator, but rather the quality of the bond; true love of Hashem is a connection to Hashem.

 

If a person’s learning is only in his mind, how can his learning become attached to Hashem?! He is involved only with his mind, but connection to HASHEM is with the heart. The mind and heart are worlds apart.

 

 

 

 

                                        Chapter Two

Torah and Fear of Hashem

 

 

 

 

All benefits of the Torah are only for one who learns for His sake

 

Firstly, a person must know that all the benefits of Torah (found in tractate Avos), only apply to one who learns Torah lishmah, for its own sake. A person who doesn’t learn Torah lishmah is not connected through it to the Creator.

 

The Nefesh HaChaim (4, 6) says, “A person should learn and think in it to connect to his Creator, by connecting all his energy to speak to Hashem.” The Torah can only connect one to the Creator only if that is the indeed the desire of the person: to connect through it to the Creator.

 

The Ramchal as well writes that when people learn Torah not for its own sake, “They are not doing anything at all, and in fact they are corrupting the order of creation. This is how Hashem designed creation, that only learning Torah for its own sake can be the key to reveal all Heavenly oros (illuminations)…”

 

The sefer Avi Ezri as well writes (Introduction, Third Edition), “Although Chazal say “A person should learn Torah even not for its own sake, for that causes one to learn Torah for its own sake”, and although learning not for the Torah’s sake is a mitzvah as well, this is only regarding the mitzvah of learning. But the benefits of Torah – such as being saved from evil traits such as jealousy, desire and honor which take a person out of this world, can only come to one who learns Torah properly.”

 

So basically, a person who doesn’t learn Torah for its own sake isn’t connected to Hashem.

 

R’ Chaim Vital writes in sefer Shaarei Kedusha, that anyone who says that he is learning Torah for its own sake is going against Rav Meir, for if he would really be learning for its own sake, he would merit many things, as stated in Avos (6:6). One who hasn’t merited any of those things is obviously not learning Torah for its own sake. So we don’t find anyone whose learning is truly connected to Hashem.

 

Torah without love and awe of Hashem is not cleaving to the Creator

 

Another fact that should be known is: what type of learning connects one to Hashem?

 

The sefarim hakedoshim say in the name of the Zohar: “Torah without awe and love does not ascend to Above.” A person can learn Torah his whole life, but if he doesn’t truly fear or love Hashem, his learning cannot connect him to Hashem.

 

Maybe one can say that most people who study Torah really love Hashem automatically. Unfortunately, the sefer Michtav M’’Eliyahu (Vol. I, p.50) says, “There are very few who keep the mitzvah of loving Hashem.”

 

There are unfortunately very few people who love Hashem, and anyone who learns Torah and doesn’t love Hashem is not connected in his learning to Hashem.

 

In order to cleave to the Creator one must study Torah will all his energy

 

Another condition needed for a person’s learning to be connected to Hashem is the words of the Nefesh HaChaim: “A person should think as he learns Torah that he is connected to Hashem in his learning, and this means to connect all his energy to Hashem…”

 

A person has to use “all his energy”; meaning, all his energies should be used for Torah. Without this, one cannot connect to the Creator. A person cannot be connected halfway; to be connected to Hashem means to be totally connected to him, and there is no such as thing as half connection.

 

Repentance before learning – every day

 

Another condition needed to connect one’s learning to Hashem are the words of the Nefesh HaChaim: “This is the true way that Hashem has chosen. Any time a person begins to learn, he should sit for a short time with pure awe of Hashem, and confess his sins from the depths his heart, in order that his learning be holy and pure. Then he should connect his learning to Hashem.”

 

Only if a person repents from the depths of his heart every day before he learns can his learning be connected to Hashem, because only a pure and holy Torah can connect a person to the Creator.

Interrupting learning to awaken awe of HASHEM

 

Another thing necessary is the additional words of the Nefesh HaChaim, “Also, while a person is in middle of learning, he is given permission to make a short interruption, so to prevent himself from forgetting awe of Hashem that he accepted upon himself before learning, and he should now reflect anew in awe of Hashem.”

 

Only one who has all these conditions can connect in his learning to Hashem

 

To summarize: 1) Learning Torah lishmah, for its own sake. 2) Before one learns, he should reflect upon awe or love of Hashem. 3) Before one learns, he should repent with all his heart. 4) In middle of learning, he should interrupt himself briefly to contemplate on awe of Hashem.

 

 

 

 

Chapter Three

A Prayer Before Learning Torah

 

Before learning, one should pray to merit the truth

 

Another point that must be made is that the Torah cannot connect one to the Creator if it is not accompanied by Tefillah (prayer). The Nefesh HaChaim (4,7) writes that when a person wants to delve into learning a halachah, he should pray to Hashem that he merit a clear understanding of the halachah and arrive at the truth of the Torah.

 

His words are not only true when it comes to learning halachah; it applies to all areas of Torah. Before a person learns, he should pray a short prayer that Hashem merit him to truly understand the Torah.

 

One who thinks that he doesn’t need to pray to understand Torah doesn’t understand what Torah is.

 

A person who thinks that he doesn’t need Hashem’s help, and that he is smart enough to understand the Torah on his own, is missing a basic understanding of the very meaning of what Torah is.

 

The Torah is the Creator’s wisdom. Man’s wisdom and the Creator’s wisdom are not the same, not just in amount, but in depth. We have no comprehension of Hashem’s wisdom. It is for this reason that the Maharal describes the Torah as a “separate knowledge”. Its whole concept is separate from man. However, a person still must strive to understand it, even according to his poor intellect. Chazal state that “It is not upon you to finish the work; but you are not permitted to exempt yourself from it.” But a person has to know that he cannot really grasp even a drop of the ocean of the Creator’s wisdom.

 

So the proper approach toward learning Torah is that a person should feel that if he would just use his own mind, he would understand very little. He must therefore ask Hashem for mercy, that he be opened up the gates of wisdom, understanding, and knowledge. Only then is there hope for him to understand Torah with his feeble mind.

This does not contradict the fact that a person has to toil in learning. A person must toil according to his abilities, and only after toiling in learning combined with heartfelt prayers will he merit Hashem’s mercy and be granted wisdom to understand.

 

The Chazon Ish’s method of learning

 

The method of the Chazon Ish is well-known. He learned in his youth with his brother, who testified on him that after every time when he toiled greatly in the learning and could not figure something out, that they would go into a corner, lift their hands up to Hashem and beg Him that they see the truth, and he would then understand.

 

The Chazon Ish also practiced his own words, in a letter which he wrote: “Learning and prayer are connected to each other; toiling in learning helps the light of prayer, and prayer helps the learning.”

 

Anyone who doesn’t do this (daven to be helped with understanding the Torah) will never truly merit understanding Torah.

 

Why did HASHEM design learning with so many difficulties?

 

We will explain this more. A person is learning and arrives at a question he can’t answer. Why did Hashem make it this way? Why can’t a person understand? There are three reasons for this.

 

1. The person learning can be impure, and the Torah cannot enter an impure vessel.

2. In order to toil more in learning. (On a deeper note, this is the same as the first reason).

3. In order that he pray more.

 

We will explain. When a person is suffering physically, we understand that the purpose of the suffering is not that he suffer, but that he should pray more; if not for the suffering he would not have prayed with as much fervor, and that is why the suffering came to him: that he should pray now with fervor. (R’ Yechezkel Levenstein zt”l would say this constantly).

 

The same thing applies to learning Torah. When a person has difficulty in the learning, the purpose is not the difficulty itself, but that it should bring him to recognize that “He does not desire the might of the horse and does not want the thighs of a man.” Even when a person feels that he is strong in Torah, it is undesirable to Hashem, as it is written, “Hashem wants those who have awe of Him, those who await his kindness.”

 

A person has to recognize that any form of suffering can bring him to the World To Come, whether it is physical suffering or spiritual suffering, such as having difficulty in learning. If a person has a difficulty in learning and he doesn’t pray to Hashem, he is destroying the whole purpose of why he has the difficulty, and he doesn’t understand that the whole purpose of why he has it so hard is to bring him closer to HASHEM.

 

Tears

 

Another condition necessary to truly understand Torah is: tears. A person has to pour forth his tears to Hashem, that he should merit to truly understand Torah.

 

Chazal say (Bava Metzia 59a), “From the day the Temple was destroyed, although the Gates of Prayer were closed, the Gates of Tears were not closed, for it says, “Hearken, Hashem, to my prayer, and listen to my calling, do not act deaf upon my tears.” One who cries true tears to Hashem is guaranteed that his prayers will be heard.

 

At first it seems hard to produce tears. But after praying for a while and being persistent, eventually one’s eyes will come to tears, and then his prayers will be answered quickly.

 

 

Chapter Four

Learning Torah With Happiness, Part One

 

 

The Torah is only acquired by someone who rejoices in it

 

In order to succeed in anything in life, a person needs to be happy. If a person is sunken into a depression, he can’t do anything. Not only is his heart closed up, but his mind as well cannot think clearly, and his memory is weak. This applies by anything, but it is especially true when it comes to Torah matters. If a person is learning Torah but he’s depressed, he can’t grow in his learning. Only if he is happy in his learning can the Torah be absorbed into his very blood and sustain him, and then he can grow.

 

There are huge differences between a sad person and a happy person. Although it is better to learn and be depressed than to be totally depressed and not learn at all, in order to truly acquire the Torah, a person must be happy in his learning.

 

Now we will explain how to acquire a true, inner happiness.

 

The Source for Depression

 

First of all, we have to figure out what causes depression. If a person wanted something, and he didn’t get it – the person feels that he is missing something. This feeling of missing something causes depression. What’s the remedy to the problem?

 

(The truth is, everyone has this problem; just the difference between a healthy person and a depressed person is in the things that make them feel missing: what is considered “missing” something?)

 

Should a person just give in to everything he wants? This will not cure depression. Should he instead give up what he wants? That won’t help either, because that will also just bring another depression.

 

The remedy to depression is that a person must understand that he doesn’t have to “want” – in other words, he needs to recognize that what he “wants” is actually not a good thing.

 

Two outlooks on life

 

A person can look at life in one of two ways:

 

1) To pursue whatever looks good.

2) To wonder, why am I created? What is the purpose of every event that happens to me? Why did Hashem bring me to such a situation?

 

According to the first outlook, if a person lacks something and doesn’t get to fulfill a certain desire, than his life is the opposite of a good life. If he gets what he wants, then life is good, but if he doesn’t get something he wants, he becomes sad.

 

But according to the second outlook, everything is different. He will know that any situation that he is in has a purpose. He knows that whether I am wealthy or poor, peaceful or stressed, in every situation I am serving the Creator.

 

Also, such a person will not have to ask why Hashem made him poor and not wealthy, because he knows that Hashem made that decision, and since Hashem knows what He’s doing, for He is infinitely wise. So every situation that he is in can always be good.

 

He will be able to feel that “Even though I don’t always understand why this situation is good, still, it is clear to me one thing: that the human intellect is limited, and cannot fathom Hashem’s reason.”

 

To sum it up: one who always knows what the source of depression is will never be depressed, because he is sure that his situation is good.

 

Contemplation every day removes depression

 

Reading what we have said here just once will not automatically make one realize that all his suffering is good. In order to feel it and live it, a person must contemplate it for a long time. He should spend fifteen minutes a day to contemplate what we have said, until he truly believes it in his heart: that every situation is really the best situation possible. It is a goodness that comes from Hashem, and its goodness transcends all good on this world. It is a good that comes from the Source of eternal good.

 

How to acquire happiness

 

Until now we have only explained how to remove depression, but we haven’t explained how to actually have happiness.

 

After a person does the above thinking for a while, he will feel in himself that the main source of the depression has left him, and his soul will be calmed. Still, he hasn’t yet reached happiness. In order to have happiness, a person must have Torah learning in its proper form – learning with a clear mindset. Then the Torah becomes to him “The laws of Hashem bring joy to the heart.”

 

Happiness and Torah learning work together simultaneously. Without Torah there is no inner happiness, and without happiness, there is no Torah. This will be explained more in the next chapter.

 

 

Chapter Five

Learning Torah with Happiness, Part Two

 

Happiness increases with the importance of what you are doing

 

In order to reach happiness, a person must recognize the importance of what he has. If someone doesn’t have importance for what he’s doing, he cannot appreciate what to be happy about.

 

If a person had a check for $100,000 and gives it to a two year old, the child will certainly enjoy playing with it. But the child isn’t deriving the real pleasure of it. If someone lacks the awareness of how important something is, he cannot rejoice in it.

 

If a person would really understand the Torah’s worth – and that Hashem’s Torah, the greatest treasure, is found in his own house, on his very table – it’s impossible not to be happy.

 

What is the root of the problem? There are two possibilities. Either one’s mind has not internalized its worth. (He can know a lot of the Torah’s worth, but he never truly contemplated it…) Or, he can indeed admit in his mind that the Torah is important; just, his heart doesn’t feel it. Joy is in the heart, and not in the mind - so he doesn’t have yet the joy in learning Torah.

 

How to have importance for the Torah

 

First we must explain the proper way on how to contemplate the Torah’s importance. We will say a few points, and you can add your own.

 

1. This world is called alma d’shikra, “a world of falsehood”. Everyone is running after pleasure, and everyone is concerned for themselves. The one true light that exists on the world is the Torah; it is called the “Torah of truth.” It is the source of truth on this world. If not for the truth of Torah that lights up the world, no truth would be able to exist at all. Anyone who has even a little ambition for the truth knows that there is no other source of truth other than the Torah.

Momentary pleasure vs. eternal pleasure

 

2. If anyone would be given the choice to have either a momentary pleasure or pleasure that would last for a year, anyone would choose the latter. So a person should think that all of this world’s pleasures are only fleeting, and that there is nothing else but learning Torah than can bring lasting pleasure. Since the Torah is eternal, whoever is connected to it has eternal pleasure. A person should imagine vividly, with a little thinking, that a day will come when it will be realized that “A person does not take with him anything when he dies.”

 

A person should think about this: all his efforts for worldly pleasures are pointless. If one would truly reflect on this, he will start to realize that any pleasure on this world is momentary. On the other hand, a person is being offered a lasting pleasure – learning Torah. (However, it should be noted that someone who hasn’t yet learned how to enjoy his learning needs special guidance on how to enjoy it.)

 

There is no pleasure like the pleasure of learning Torah

 

3. Not only is the amount of pleasure in learning Torah greater than the span of pleasure found on this world, but the very depth of the pleasure of learning Torah is itself the deepest form of pleasure. Any other pleasures found on this world are a joke compared to the enjoyment derived from learning.

 

Someone who never felt pleasure from his learning must pray, beg, and cry to Hashem that He have pity on him and merit to taste the enjoyment of learning.

 

How Torah wisdom differs from all other wisdoms

 

There is no wisdom like Torah wisdom. The reason is because all other types of wisdom have limits. But Torah is the Creator’s wisdom. Its wisdom is endless – in its amount and in its depth. Anyone who has merit to probe the depths of Torah can attest to this fact very well: no wisdom can compare to it.

 

One who wants to cleave to the Creator should cleave to Torah

 

4. One who understands that the purpose of his life is to cleave to the Creator must realize that there is no way to connect to Him except through learning Torah. (But only if he fulfills the conditions necessary in learning Torah, as we explained earlier). It is the tool that brings a person closest to Hashem. How can a person ever be unhappy if he knows that every second he has the ability to become so close to Him? If one truly knows it in the depths of his heart, he will never slacken off from studying Torah.

 

 

 

 

Chapter Six

Torah and Kindness

 

 

A Torah of Kindness

 

One of the main traits necessary in meriting the “crown of Torah” is to “learn Torah and teach it to others”, otherwise known as “the Torah of kindness on her lips”. We will explain.

 

There is a rule that “In the way a person measures others, he is measured.” If a person would only put efforts into learning based on his own measuring yardstick, his situation would not be very good. Even though he will understand some things, his perception will be very limited, because he will only attain according to the level he aimed to arrive at. But if he is bestowing his efforts on others, then he is learning Torah to do kindness. He wants to benefit others that they too should understand Torah. He is then measured accordingly in Heaven, and he is given an abundance of understanding the Torah, each according to his own level; but now he is meriting an understanding even above his previous level.

 

How a person can merit bountiful blessing

 

We will explain the matter more deeply. If a person wants to have something, there are one of two ways how he can acquire it.

 

1. Through rights. A worker receives wages at the end of the day for his work, and so too one receives reward from HASHEM for his efforts.

2. As a kindness from the benefactor.

 

There is a fundamental difference. If a person receives payment because of his actions, he will receive exactly according to how hard he worked. But if he receives it as a kindness, he is receiving something not according to what he did; there is no set amount to what he receives. HASHEM’s kindness is unlimited,  and a person must strive to receive HASHEM’s kindnesses. When he does receive it, he is endlessly connected to his Creator.

 

Two ways how to do kindness with Torah

 

How can a person merit Hashem’s kindness? The Mishnah (Avos 6,1) says: “R’ Meir says, Whoever learns Torah for its own sake… becomes like a fortified wellspring, and like an unceasing river.” Let us explain this. There are two ways to learn Torah in order to be kind.

 

1) He doesn’t learn for himself. He doesn’t even learn because he wants to connect to the Creator; because that’s also called learning for himself! He is only learning to give pleasure to the Creator. So his whole learning is in order to do kindness – to be kind to Hashem, so to speak.

 

2) He teaches Torah to others, in order that they should benefit from understanding the Torah, and that others’ children as well will study Torah and give pleasure to Hashem.

 

Such a person who learns Torah, in this way, is learning purely from kindness. Whether he learns by himself or with others, he is totally attached to Hashem, and he stands in Hashem’s gate of kindness. He will merit Hashem’s kindness, which is endless; and this is what it means to become a “fortified wellspring and an unceasing river.”  His learning will become unlimited and won’t cease.

 

These words are in the Gemara (Pesachim 50b). “Rava asked a contradiction. The possuk says (Tehillim 57), “For your kindness is so great it extends to the heavens”; and in another possuk it says (ibid 108), “For your kindness is above the heavens”. One refers to one who learns Torah for its own sake, and the other refers to one who learn Torah not for its own sake.” From here we see that one who learns Torah for its own sake is doing kindness with his learning, and his kindness is a kindness that is above the heavens; it is a kindness that transcends the boundaries of earth.

 

Acquiring Torah and humbling oneself to the Torah

 

Another important point to make, and the most important point of all we have said, is that there are two types of studying the Torah. 1) Acquiring the Torah. 2) Humbling oneself to the Torah.

 

A person who learns Torah all day and night acquires a great wealth. He becomes an expert in the Gemara, in its profundity and depth, and the Torah becomes like a part of him.

But there is another aspect as well in learning Torah, and it is entirely different. It is what King Shlomo says, “I said I was wise, but it (wisdom) is far from me”. How can this be? Shlomo was the wisest of all men; how could it be that he should be the one to say that “the Torah is far from me”?

 

This is the secret of what it means to truly study Torah. Hashem has no end, and therefore His wisdom has no end; therefore it follows that the Torah has no end. No one can truly come near the Torah’s depth, because the Torah is endless, while a person is limited. He is always far from it.

 

Contemplating the eternity of the Torah nullifies materialistic pursuits

 

One needs to ask then: what is the point of toiling in the Torah, if the Torah is endless and he will never reach it anyway?

 

But in here lies the whole secret of life. The purpose of a person on this world is to truly reach a state where he feels like nothing. His entire ambitions are ultimately devoted to nullify his materialistic desires – totally. So the more a person sees how endless the Torah is, and how limited his mind is, the more he roots out his own ego, the “I” in a person; until he reaches a level where he feels like a nothing, in comparison to Hashem.

 

 

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